It all starts in the fall, when the weather cools ever-so-slightly, the days grow shorter and the leaves begin to turn, every coffee shop in America starts offering some sort of pumpkin spice flavored coffee drink if not several of them. And if that isn’t bad enough, this disheartening annual event has also invaded other beverages including beer and tea. No thanks, we are quite happy with premium coffee beans, without the pumpkin spice added. This infatuation with pumpkin spice seems to gather more momentum each year with thoughtful individuals discovering, even more, foods and beverages they can poison with this spice. It’s really out of control.

Everybody wants a slice of the pumpkin spice pie (nice pun, though completely unintended), you can now buy, if you so dare, pumpkin spice Oreos, pumpkin spice cereal and pumpkin spice yogurt. It is our humble, but accurate, opinion that the majority of pumpkin spiced food and drinks out there are simply not good, not even appetizing if you must know.

What once started, seemingly harmless at the time, as a season frothy beverages from your neighborhood Starbucks is now completely out of control. Seriously, when you shop your favorite grocery store and spot a can of pumpkin spice pringles, you know the rest of your day is headed south. What’s worse is that this horrific obsession with pumpkin spice has leaked into other consumer goods, not just foods and drinks. You can now buy pumpkin spiced beard oil, air fresheners and car litter. And not to leave dogs out of the picture, you can buy Fido pumpkin spiced dog treats.

We are beyond peak levels of pumpkin spice madness, we have soared to stratospheric levels of pumpkin spice. In fact, it is so out of reach that even a congressional order can’t stop it. Our only hope is an executive order from our incoming Commander-in-Chief.

Pumpkin spice’s biggest offense is that it has stolen the spotlight from otherwise really decent and good-tasting foods, except Pringles chips, of course. Coffee not quite working for you? Well, just dump some pumpkin spice in it and all is good. Hey, let’s just eliminate salt and fill our shakers with pumpkin spice. These fries need a little something, could you please pass the pumpkin spice?

There was a time when we looked forward to fall and the holiday season, when the only thing that got us mad was when the neighbor’s Christmas decorations came up before Thanksgiving.

The best way to move forward in this age of pumpkin spice it to ignore it completely, the same way everybody ignores Uncle Lester at Thanksgiving dinner when he begins talking about the problems he has with ingrown toenails. Nobody understands why he has to go into such graphic details.

Better still, order a pound or two of our African coffee beans, or Ethiopian coffee beans for that matter and ease through the holiday season with some of the best coffee around.